Jacksonville City Attorney reportedly missed several events due to being dazed by vehicle headlights

Jacksonville, FL — Michael Fackler, Jacksonville's General Counsel, has missed dozens of early morning and nighttime work events after apparently being dazed by the headlights of incoming traffic.

"I know the people of Jacksonville expect more of their public officials, but... I mean, have you ever stared down the barrel of a set of LED headlights while people honk at you? It's hard to not just stand in amazement for 10—sometimes even 30— minutes at a time."

We cut the interview short after he stopped responding to our questions and started staring at a pile of dry corn on the floor in his office.