Sheriff: Next person to have me work a night shift is getting shot.

Jacksonville, FL — In his third late night press conference in two weeks, Jacksonville Sheriff T.K. "Wake 'em Up" Waters expressed his frustration at being relegated to the night shift.

"Look, this is like the third time in two weeks I've had to come out here in the middle of the night, and I'm getting tired of it. I'm not union, my shift differential sucks. Let me put it to you this way, if I have to work another night shift because you made one of my deputies shoot you, I'm going to shoot you too."

Chief Michael Paul closed out the press conference with "Yeah, if he has to work another night shift because you made one of his deputies shoot you, he's going to shoot you too."